We’re Not Like Other Mattress Companies

Sure, we look the same, sound the same, and feel the same — but we couldn’t be more different.

Hey there! We’re Feather & Hippo. We sell mattresses. But we’re not like all those other mattress companies you’ve been hearing about. We’re disruptors. You see, other mattress companies do things the dumb old way. We do things the cool new way. Because we were founded a few months later.

They blend comfort and firmness. We blend softness and support.

They use memory foam. We use our proprietary MemoriFoam® material.

And while their mattresses arrive vacuum-sealed with fast, free shipping, ours arrive vacuum-sealed with fast, free shipping and “Feather & Hippo” printed on the box. We couldn’t be more different!

Trying to compare us to other mattress companies is like trying to compare apples and other, different apples. Can you imagine? A Pink Lady and a Red Delicious don’t even belong in the same sentence. I mean, one’s a pink apple, and the other’s a red apple. Polar opposites.

In other words: we’re the Mary-Kate of mattresses. And they’re the Ashley. Ew.

Look, we know shopping for a mattress is hard. You probably didn’t even realize you were doing it at first. But one day, you made the pea-brained mistake of googling “tips for better sleep” without opening an incognito tab — and whammo! You’re in our crosshairs now, buddy.

Suddenly, every waking moment of your life is filled with mattress ads from twenty different brands, and you start thinking, “Maybe I do need a new mattress. Maybe if I slept better, I’d probably get that promotion at work, and then Linda would finally go out with me.”

But how to choose the right one? It’s pretty overwhelming. After all, our competitors promise to give you the best sleep of your life. Meanwhile we promise to give you the best sleep of your life — in a different sans-serif font.

So while we might look similar, our product just isn’t the same. In fact, here’s a dirty little secret our competitors don’t want you to know: Most of them don’t even manufacture their own mattresses. They’re all made out of identical materials and mass-assembled at a third-party facility.

Of course, at Feather & Hippo, we don’t manufacture our own mattresses either. But ours are manufactured in a completely separate wing of the same factory the other guys use. They’re on the north side. We’re on the south side. It’s so far away, you have to use a golf cart.

And while other mattress companies charge markups, we just charge you what it costs to make your mattress, plus an additional fee to turn a profit. So while our prices might look the same, they’re metaphorically, philosophically, and deontologically different.

That’s why we’re the Tia, and they’re the Tamara.

We’re so confident you’ll love your new Feather & Hippo mattress that if you’re not satisfied after 100 nights, you can ship it back for a full refund. (Provided you own a commercial vacuum sealer and are physically, mentally, and emotionally capable of hauling it to the post office).

So try Feather & Hippo today! Then check out our sister company: Fork & Plate. Finally, a meal-kit delivery service that’s not like those other meal-kit delivery services!

Run by request with no byline to protect the writer from the mattress-industrial complex!