The Emotional State Of The Union

As told by therapy notes

Ilana Gordon
The Belladonna Comedy
4 min readFeb 5, 2019

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Nothing to see here. Totally fine!

January 2, 2018

After a trying and self-destructive 2017, the Union hopes to enter into this year with an open mind and renewed focus on self-improvement. Among the topics we plan to address in 2018: trust issues and difficulties navigating authority. We are also working to implement strategies for effective communication, reducing misinformation and strengthening interpersonal relationships.

February 5, 2018

The Union reports very high levels of anxiety. It admits to watching cable news non-stop and self-medicating to deal with stress. The Union says that in the past year, it has struggled with overeating, over-drinking, smoking too much, masturbating constantly and spending too much time on Zillow looking at houses in Canada.

I wanted to discuss some solutions, but by the time the Union finished itemizing all its concerning behaviors, the session was over.

March 12, 2018

The Union appears to be in better spirits. We worked to brainstorm healthier coping mechanisms, including watching less news programming and occasionally going outside for a walk. I also recommended engaging with less polarizing television options, like “Fuller House” or “Queer Eye.”

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Writer of comedy + other things: Input Magazine, The A.V. Club, The Daily Dot, Jezebel, The Takeout, McSweeneys, Reductress, The American Bystander | @IlanaAbby